…but even when it was working, it had never done a very good job on my living room carpet, which is exceptionally cheap and nasty. It’s woven from artificial fibres, which moult and then get stuck in the remaining pile, forming hairballs. The hoover wasn’t powerful enough to do more than push those around; it functioned more as an old-fashioned carpet sweeper, and left the place looking almost as filthy as if I didn’t bother to hoover at all.

So; I needed a new hoover. Immediately discounting the overpriced dyson-type tat, I went to look for one of those “henry” devices that office cleaners use. I reasoned that they cost about £25, so were essentially disposable. Better still - though they may not have nilfisk-grade filtration, or any other “features” to speak of, they are powerful and reliable enough for industrial use, and are therefore easily good enough for use in the not.nothovel.

Unfortunately, that idea seems to have occurred to more than a few other people, and Henry prices have quadrupled in the last five years. bah.